8-Week “GET FUCKING HUGE” PPL×2 MAYHEM

Program Description

Week 1–2 you’re allowed to be a little bitch and leave 3 in the tank. Week 3–5 you better grow some balls and get down to 2. Week 6–8 we’re going full send — 0–1 RIR or you’re just masturbating with the bar. Week 8 you die on every working set or I’m personally coming to your gym to slap the protein shake out your hand. NO MERCY. NO BITCHES. ONLY GAINS.” Week 9 Deload Options (pick one) A) 50 % volume, 80–85 % loads (recommended) B) Full week off + binge eating C) Switch to bodyweight + light pump work only “After the Week 9 break, add 5–10 % to every single lift you PR’d and run the exact same 8 weeks again. Most animals can milk 2–3 full cycles (24 weeks total) before needing a new program.” Rest Times Compounds: 2–3 min Isolation: 90–120 sec Myo-rep clusters: only 10 deep breaths between mini-sets Progression Philosophy “This is a double-progression bloodbath. Add reps → then add weight → repeat. If you’re not adding 1–2 reps or 5–20 lb almost every week, you’re sandbagging or not eating.” Myo-rep finishers (rear delts, biceps, triceps, calves) → Always full 0 RIR on the top set and every mini-set from Week 1 onward. No pussyfooting. Myo-Rep Cluster Quick Cheat Sheet (for rear delts, biceps, triceps, calves) Activation: 12–20 reps @ RPE 6–7 Top set: max reps to 0 RIR Then 10 deep breaths → max → 10 breaths → max → repeat until mini-set drops below 4 reps Entire cluster = 1 hard set. Beat total reps or add weight weekly. If you’re not in a 250–500 kcal surplus and eating 1.6–2.2 g protein per lb bodyweight, don’t even start this program. You’ll just spin your wheels and cry on Reddit. Exercise Substitution Bible (so nobody whines “my gym doesn’t have X”) Hack Squat → Pendulum squat / V-squat / high-foot leg press Leg Press → Belt squat / front squat Cable Flexion Row → Chest-supported T-bar / seal row / Meadows row MAG Pulldown → Neutral close-grip / V-bar / weighted pull-up RDL → DB RDL / American deadlift / good-morning Rear-Delt Destroyer → DB rear laterals / reverse pec-deck / band pull-aparts Pain is temporary, but being small is forever. Stop being a bitch, pin the program, and let’s get fucking enormous.

Program Overview